June 3, 2010
Americans abroad, Children, Expats in Saudi, Islam, Law, Mary Peachy, parenting, Pastor Vernon Peachy, Ruth Mary Shane Phelan
…as apple pie bean pie!
I cook barbecue chicken, chili, mac and cheese. In Ramadan I never fail to have a big feast with turkey, dressing, cranberry sauce, candy yams, and all the other traditional American holiday foods San the roasted ham. When I’m feeling ethnic I make tacos or order pizza!
My daughters ride horses and camels.
They are involved in many sports like swimming, Taekwondo, Karate, and gymnastics.
They are bilingual
They love adventure!
They go to the zoo
They play Uno and Connect four.
They ride bikes and Green Machines.
They have sibling rivalry! It drives me nuts!
Most of all they have a GOOD FATHER who loves and looks after their well being.
We are American expatriates residing in Saudi Arabia. Many people have raised families abroad. We do no smoke, drink, do drugs,or engage in criminal activity or immoral behavior. Our daughters are as dear to us as our sons. As Americans in Saudi we are not expected to conform to the cultural norms of this society. We are not Saudi, we are American.
We know the value of proper upbringing of children. Children, are a trust given to the parents. Parents are to be responsible for this trust on the Day of Judgement. Parents are essentially responsible for the moral, ethical and the basic and essential religious teachings of their children.
Islam sees that if parents fulfill their duties towards all children in terms of providing them with necessary training, educational backing, moral, ethical and religious education, this will definitely lead to a more caring child, a better family atmosphere and better social environment and awareness. The father is the shepherd over his family, protecting them, providing for them, and striving to be their role model and guide in his capacity as head of the household.
There is no need to be concerned about my husband raising any of his children. He cherishes them all and would be the last person to cause intentional harm to them.
Muslims please do not admonish me by telling me it’s haram to post images. I do not usually publicly post pictures of my family and I seek refuge in Allah with His total words from the every devil, vermin and from the evil eye.
April 12, 2009
breastfeeding, Children, Life, motherhood, nursing, parenting, ramblings
So I’m sittng here catching up on whatever my crappy little computer will allow me to and Adam and his friend walk in the room and I ask Adam where is the baby. He ignores me and keeps playing. I then start screaming out for the baby to come here. He doesn’t come, so I figure I better go look for him. As I get up to go look for him I look down at him and unlatch him from my you know what. It still didn’t hit me. Then I figured it out! I’m nursing him!!!!!!!!!!
I did the same thing with my phone yesterday. I was talking on my cell phone and looking for my camera at the same time. The camera is on my cell phone!!!!!!!!!!!
March 10, 2009
Children, domestic help, entrepreneurs, husbands, Islam, maids, marriage, Men, motherhood, Mothers, Muslims, nannies, parenting, Religion, SAHM, School, WAHM, women
Authoo Billahi Minash Shaytaanir Rajeem
Bismillahir Rahmanir Raheem
Subhanallah (said to glorify God), that worked ^^ mashaállah (said to express that God willed this)!
I am a little more settled. My blood feels like it it literally boiling, I am physically upset, heart racing, palpatations, queasy, adrenaline pumped, etc.
I over slept this morning. I actually slept right through fajr…astaurfirallah (asking for God’s forgiveness)! I usually start my day at fajr (the pre dawn prayer. 1st of ouf 5 of the Muslim’s daily obligatory prayers) and wake the girls up for school at 6am (if they did everything the night before – bath, packed bags, etc). Lately, I’ve only been getting 2-3 hours of sleep a night, because I get most of my work done after I’ve put them to sleep…and there is a lot of work to be done when trying to set up multiple streams of income online. My alarm on my clock doesn’t work and my husband uses the Alarm on his, so I use my cell phone as an alarm. After Adam emerged it in water and I paid a pretty penny for it to get fixed, the battery just hasn’t been the same. If anyone knows anything about Saudi then the should know that once something is out it’s out of stock for months! I can not find the battery for my Nokia N95. So even though it was fully charged when I went to sleep and I was to get up in only 2 hours, the battery died in my sleep. I woke up on my own at 6:57am. I was anxious from the minute I opened my eyes. I only woke up because the baby was tapping me to get up! I started screaming for the girls to get up, hurry up, letting them know we over slept. I was in frantic mode but not upset.
I called my husband! Right away he pissed me off! He said, “I knew I shouldn’t have answered my phone”. I told him, you can say no if you want I’m just asking you before I call the driver. He then said that i can’t take no for an answer. i said you never said NO! I haven’t even asked the question yet! He was upset that I even considered him an option when I could use a driver. I told him he is always the first choice and the driver is the option. If I send them with a driver I would go and would have to haul the boys with me, which would make them even later. School starts at 6:45am. He then went on to say that I’m up all night and sleepin in! I KNEW he would find a way to try and bring shame or blame on me for doing my Entrepreneur thing. Sleeping in! I over slept ONE FRIGGIN TIME! He said, what about the other times they are late. I said that’s them missing the bus and it’s not my fault. I wake them up on time. He said they are kids so it is my fault if they are lolly dagging around or looking for something or any of the other countless things that can make a kid miss their bus! So now my adrenaline is pumped. I’m going off asking him why he has this NEED to ALWAYS place fault and blame on people, yet he ALWAYS wants others to make excuses for his UNACKNOWLEDGED short comings!
I hung up on him…
Then called back to say that I was not riding with them, that I was sending them alone with a driver. Don’t ask me why I said that. I wasn’t lying, I honestly at the time don’t know what I was thinking. So he said, don’t do this to him. TO HIM! He said to have the maid ride with them. I told him that she was sleep and doesn’t wake up until 9am. He was livid and said to wake her up. I knew she would have an attitude. She walks around with attitude all the time, but is a great cook and excellent maid. So I woke her up and told her it would only take a few minutes to go with the driver around the corner and back (they could walk but they have to cross a busy street with morning rush). She starts saying something to me too loud and in the wrong tone of voice and I snapped. All of the mais I’ve had got spoiled in my house, they get treated better than anyone in the house when it comes to me NOT snapping. Since my adrenaline was still pumped from dealing with my babies daddy, I went off. I told her that she gets more sleep then ANYBODY in the house and that I do not ask her for much and NEVER wake her up. I said if I need her to do something then I don’t need her attitude. She changed completedly after that. Got all soft spoken and acting like there was some misunderstanding. She knew I was right, because no maid sleeps until 9am! Most people’s day, especially maids start at fajr (currently 5am). She is the first one to go to sleep and the last one to get up. I haven’t complained because she gets her work done and I need my space. Technically, they are domestic help. They are not JUST maids. they usaually do everything but my maid has limited work. She cooks and cleans and I take care of my own kids. I should be sleeping in all day letting her get up in the mourning but if it’s hard for me to do it, hence hiring a maid, then why would I expect her to cook, clean, and take care of the kids!
So as soon as she left I was more pumped and anxious than I was after talking to my husband. I unconsciously started speed cleaning. When she got back she took over the cleaning but I was still physically upset and thought I would blog a rant or vent, which I usually avoid but I was so stressed.
It did not even occur to me to say authoo billah minash shaytaanir rajeem (the Prophet Muhammad -peace and blessing of Allah be upon him- advised one should seek refuge in Allah from the acursed satan/devil when agree and should verbalise this) until I started to write this. It was just naturally the first thing I typed. I don’t know why it was not the first thing I uttered…astaurfirallah! I immediately started to calm done and now as I come to my conclusion I feel much better wa lilalilhamd (and all the praise is to God).
*After going back to include translation I am now calm and wondering what the big deal was. I’m convinced that shaytaan provoke the anger in a person. I’m still exhausted and my eyes are very heavy but my day has started now.
March 6, 2009
Bedtime, Children, Family, Life, parenting
I wrote this 4 days ago but when I logged in today I saw it was sitting in my drafts. Oops!
Ideally the kids would be SLEEP no later than 8pm on school nights. I have bedtime set for 7pm because if I actually had it set for 8pm (it’s 6 on the dot now and they are still not ready) they wouldn’t get in until 9pm. So tonight when I tell them to get ready for bed, my daughter informs me, “I have to geleb my kutub”. Yes, that is how my kids talk in Englabic – especially when it comes to school terms because they don’t always know the English word for it. So I am livid that she waits until bedtime to let me know that they wewre issued their new school books which all needed to be covered. Anybody with kids in Saudi schools know that they give out tons of books each semester so now they are up gelebing their kutubs…lol
So while the girls geleb their kutubs, I also have them practicing for their weekly spelling test. Well, I knew this day would come and what a better time for this to happen then when mom is going crazy because her new semester new rules aren’t working!
Yup that’s right, adam cut his hair! What kind of a fammily would we be if this did not happen. i was expecting this, only i thought he would cut his sisters hair. Instead he interrupts everything and says, “I cut my hair…you know like a hair cut!” I started feeling around his hair and sure nuff it started coming off in my hand and on the floor. well better him than the girls. My brother cut my hair twice. the first time I was in Kindegarten and was teased mercifulessly for the rest of the year and called, “Baldilocks” after my mom took me to the salon to have it trimmed into an afro!!!!!!!!!!!
And as if this was not enough bedtime drama, while I was forcing the kids to pose for my blog entry (it is not always easy because they want to turn and look and I have to tell them that it is for my blog and that I don’t want to show their face. Tonight my 6 1/2 year old says, “they are going to think we are weird or something”), the baby literally slipped away! Someone left the kitchen door open and as I called for him to get out of the garbage he turned around and slipped because SOMEBODY was obviously trying to refill their spilled bubble container with dish washing detergent and left a mess on the floor.
O.k gotta go put them in bed!
January 17, 2009
Bed, Bedtime, Children, Family, Family Bed, Goodnight, Goodnight Moon, kids, Life, Love, motherhood, parenting
“Goodnight room. Goodnight moon. Goodnight cow jumping over the moon. Goodnight light, and the red balloon…”
January 13, 2009
Baby, baby's first steps, Children, Family, kids, Life, parenting, stuff kids say, walking
The girls are getting ready for school. Here is this morning’s talk:
DD #1: your teacher is sooo mean, she screams at me whenever YOU do something wrong. Don’t fall asleep in class today.
DD #2: I KNOW! *Awwal Jeem’s teacher is sooo nice. She gives them lollypops. All you have to do is go to the teacher and say, “May I have a lollypop” and she gives you one. But not *Awwal Ba’s teacher, she’s sooo mean!
DD#1: You should transfer to awwal jeem.
* Saf Awwal is First grade, they have 4 1st grade classes and she is in awwal ba (class b)
In other exciting news.
Suger Ray Ray took his first unassisted steps last night (11months) – masha’Allah – and I MISSED IT ! So the girls are running late for school trying to reenact it for me.
This would have made a much better video, because he kept getting excited and clapping his hands, turning to look at me to see if I can see his accomplishments, and falling down. He’s not 100% yet but it’s a milestone – masha’Allah.
January 12, 2009
boogers, boys, Children, Family, kids, Life, Love, parenting
I think children are fascinating little things. Take my Adam for example, it always amazes me how he has a split personality. He is generally a very good boy – masha’Allah. However, he does let his guard down with me and at home.
Last week when picking him up from the bus stop, all of the kids happily bounced off the bus with bright smiles and excited to see their awaiting mothers. Adam slowly walked off the bus with his head down and a look of concern on his face. When he approached me, he stuck out his finger and with a look of shame whispered, “here Mommy…it’s a booger” and handed me this dried up bloody booger. Any other kid would have wiped that booger on the seat or something, but not Mommy’s good boy. He’s like that – so considerate – masha’Allah. I told him to just hold on to his little booger until we got home and then I would clean it all up.
Tonight, we are all layng in the bed going to sleep (yes ALL OF US! I finally got the girls in their room and wouldn’t you know it now my baby rolls and crawls and falls out the bed every chance he gets and so now I’ve decided to put them all to bed on the floor in the girls room) and Adam’s ‘at home with my loving Mommy’ personality comes out. After we recite Quran and make our dua, he looks over at me while I’m nursing the baby to sleep and says, “Mommy can I put a booger in Ray Ray’s hair?” Of course I tell him he can not. I had no idea the question was posed in hindsight and he said, “Okay, let me get it out of his hair” and proceeded to remove his little booger from his baby brothers hair.
What happened to my considerate son?
He does the same thing wth his school bag. His teacher tells me how proud she is of him because he always keeps his station clean and never moves to the next activity center until he puts everything properly away. Yet he walks in the door of the house and drops everything at the entry. Of course my husband dotes about this. He thinks that our children feel loved and secure and this is why they are slobs more comfortable expressing themselves with us. I’m sure there is some truth in that.
Yup my little critters – masha’Allah.
*He totally built that animal parking lot all by himself and as soon as I pulled out my camera this other kid came along messing up stuff!