This morning my family was coming home from a Walima (yes, morning…we left at 3 AM!). It was a long and exhausting drive, the kids were sleep, but I stayed awake to watch my husband. He was tired, because he slept in the car for 3 hours. The men eat and call it quits around midnight, but the women party all night long!

My husband and I are an inter-racial couple. I am African American he is White American. We had been driving around longer than necessary, cuz well my dh gets lost a lot. Every time, I tried to start a conversation he requested silence. At one point he looked like he was dozing off, so I asked if he was OK. That started me to go into a soliloquy about being tired. Then I asked him if he ever heard the expression “I’m sick and tired of being sick and tired”. I asked him not to play tennis today, because his body had rights over him and that he was tired and that he always gets sick after being tired. Then I reminded him to never forget to thank Allah for being a man. I explained how merciful Allah was to him, because every time he gets sick, he gets sick leave and can go in his room and recover bi’ithnillah. I went on to say that it is not so for the mother, because she has to manage a house regardless of her physical or mental state. I then praised Allah and said, “Can you imagine how tired you must be to be sick and tired of being sick and tired?”

Still silence on his end.

I took that to mean continue – so I did. I said, “Just imagine being out in the field from sun up to sun down. Day after day. Pregnant! Delivering your child in the field and going back to work the same day!”

DH: Where’s that Root Beer?

If you guys know anything about me then you know that I can carry on a pretty good conversation all by myself, I don’t need a man…lol. So I went on to say how slavery has done more damage to my people than anything else and how we are still suffering as a people from it’s evil effects.

Dh: Can you scratch my back? 

I Imagine he was thinking (if he was paying attention to me), “Isn’t this why you have a blog? why are you telling me this?”

I then place my hand on his lap. We sometimes hold hands in the car. At the time he was driving with both hands on the wheel. He let go of the wheel with one hand and reached over and held my hand switched gears.

Ebony and Ivory living together in perfect harmony…