Just a few thoughts…

1. I read a comment today on another blog that gave me the impression that non-Blacks view the ‘decent’ black as an exception – not the rule. That kind of wiped me out. Honestly, I can’t confirm this theory or deny it. That makes me rather sullen. I was already in a funk about the bathtub incident with my son yesterday, but this thought completely drained me.

Wait! I just had an ah ha moment…Islamically speaking there are more ‘bad’ people in this world than ‘good’, so I guess all ‘decent’ people are the exception rather than the rule. Still not the boost I needed…

2. Can Western convert Muslim women really be super shy? I read an email to a sisters group from a sister who was requesting that another sister contact some scholars on her behalf. She said that she had their contact info and could speak Arabic, but her shyness with men prevented her from being able to speak. I may be confusing her with someone else but I thought she was a convert and from Philly nonetheless. I consider myself a modest person and I think that a certain amount of shyness is a lofty goal to aspire and a trait that I hope my children have. However, I’m just not super shy. As a matter of fact it is one of the things that annoy me when I am out and about, that I am to be seen (well veiled) but not heard. It would be easier if I had a more assertive husband, but he gets shy in public! So if my children are miss behaving he tells me and I scream for them to come back, get down, don’t do that, or whatever. Then he says, “do you hear any other women’s voices out here?” Same with when we are shopping or need anything done. My husband doesn’t ask people anything and I am not too shy to approach a man who works in the store and ask if they have what i am looking for. I even have to put workers (gardeners, drivers, etc) in check from time to time because instead of telling them something my husband tells me. My daughters are doing it too, because when I try to be shy and not talk to men than I have them tell what I want because my dh just is too frustrating to deal with because he won’t say anything!

I’ve observed the women of this society. They too are modest but not super shy. Sure you have the super shy types but they are generally shy period, not just with men. However, most women are either phony shy or they are modest in their interactions with men. I was really shocked that this sister was too shy to ask a Shaykh her question over the phone. Modest sure. Embarrassed…okay. But shy?! I just didn’t get it.

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